Friday, June 02, 2006

a series of mail: marriage anyone?

Behind this posting lies aseries of mails i exchanged with my best friend Aryabrata, a gem of a person,somebody who manages to hide a very sharp and balanced mind behind a facade of practised and easygoing ignorance to most( not all) worldly matters.

Whenever i am down,out and looking for some real solid advice,arya is the guy i call up.
His clear thinking and simple dedicated line of thought is a welcome break from all the complications of most people around me.
Read on

.But it escapes me why the bright young men of our country,most of whom are capable of 3000-odd lines of complex Java programming or can manufacture a valve/car/turbine as per SIX-SIGMA specifications, are considered NOT GOOD ENOUGH and absolutely incapable of marrying the woman they love???
Is it because these bright young men(BYM) are too self-centred or too nice to open their mouth and rightfully declare their love when the crunch comes???

or is it because...inspite of our big talks of liberalisaton and open society, we are still stuck in 18 th century traditional values as far as the position of women in our society is concerned????

do fathers still consider their daughters as part of the furniture and a burden...something(!) to be disposed off at the earliest opprtunity???
YES...they do.Because we, the BYM of India are not doing anything to prove them otherwise.We are not coming forward and professing our love for these AMAZING YOUNG LADIES,so these fathers have no idea about how much their daughters mean to precious and wonderful they are!so for lack(????) of better alternatives, they marry of their daughters with some loser who has spent all his adolescent and adult life calling up the girls` hostel and asking random females"will you make a meet with me???"
Ki aar bolbo...jaago purush jaago.
dont fall in it.

On Tue, 30 May 2006 wrote :>
Dear satyaki,
May be u are right . But this is a ageless tradition which till this date has kept its standing and has led to many happy>lives . may be it is right that 2 or 3 yrs is not the right time to know a person specially cause>u cannot be as close to a person as u can be after marriage . That why many a love marriage 's break up . Take the case>of shreya only . It was a fairy tale union for her but at this phase of life she is reeling under a sense of rejection and unfound love .>That s life . Its not that i am telling that arranged marriages can bring u lot of happiness or that they are eternal .
>But they too carry a different ideology when it stamps a union of two hence unknown persons in body and spirit .>>
But still I too believe that love marriages are far better than the arranged ones since here the positives and negatives
>are both in ur hands and the future is only urs . good or bad . Still this is the experience of only a lucky few.>
>And I I don't think we are quite lucky in this front .
Hence start to luv arranged marriages . .....>>this is the morale of my reply !!!!!!!!

Original Message----->

From: satyaki bhattacharya []>Sent: Monday, May 29, 2006 11:06 PM>

Subject: Re: RE:>>>>>
marriages depress me because chances are they are mostly an union of a male and a female who dont know each other.>
they are dragged into it by their parents.
>the girl is giong along because she is lead to believe that the person her parents have chosen for her is BETTER than the person she loves.>
the guy goes along cause he knows the girls dad is giving him a substancial dowry.>plus he has already lost the girl he liked.
Until and unless its love marriage( they rarely are)>its something very depressing for me.>
because its a big compromise
On Sat, 27 May 2006 wrote

>why do marraiges depress u
especially others ! nijer biya mana galai ghanti can be quite depressing but others can be fun ....> jai hok phone kaj korcha

Original Message----->

> From: satyaki bhattacharya []> >Sent: Friday, May 26, 2006 8:25 PM>
>To:> >Subject: Re:> >> >> >> >
ami bhalo aachi
ekhane shob thikthak cholche.>
>may go to kolkata on july 20 th for mashir cheler biye.> >
i hate marriages ,so may not even go.>
>marriages depress me.>
>very much.>
>take care> >